Musical Inspiration: My J-Pop Writing Soundtrack
Most of the songs I grew up with are J-Pop. I go long stretches of my life listening to whatever is popular (i.e., American), but whenever I really need music as a solace, I return to J-Pop. I get that for a lot of people J-Pop is overly sentimental and melodramatic without even the technical virtuosity of K-Pop. But you know what? There is something comforting listening to what you grew up with, and I think when sung in Japanese (the language), the lyrics are not as corny, even though a word-for-word English translation would be so over-the-top it would make my ears bleed.
This post will be much more interesting for any Japanese speakers/people who listen to J-Pop, but here it goes anyways: the songs I associate with each of my main characters!
Serena: 地獄恋文 - Inferno Love Letter by tuki.
I love a good romance subplot, but given my upbringing around romantic relations when liking someone was in and of itself “sinful” (because it wasn’t the man God chose for you), I am a real sucker for forbidden romance. It’s no surprise to me that I associate this song with Serena, given the way the lyrics play on the concepts of forbidden romance and hell. I was listening to it obsessively during the time of my life I was writing the first draft of The Acolyte’s Heresy.
「地獄で会いましょう (Let’s meet in hell)
貴方も私も悪い人だ (You and I are bad people)
ひとつになんてさ (We can’t become one)
なれないけど愛してる (But I still love you)」
Kara: CITRUS by Da-iCE
If you know anything about Kara’s personality, it’s obvious why this song is “so Kara.” She is the fiercest protector of them all. The first time I heard this song after the character of Kara was “born,” I knew this was her anthem.
「離さないって決めたから (I decided I wasn’t letting you go)
守りたいって言ったのさ (That’s why I said I would protect you)
ホンモノの強さだけ (True strength)
見つけたくて (Is the only thing I seek)
今未練なんかこれっぽっちも無い (I have no regrets)」
Sage: hitotoshite by SUPER BEAVER
When I first heard this song (Superfly’s cover), I felt my soul tremble. This song honestly could go with any of my characters; which is another way of saying it could be the theme song for every novel I’ve written. I decided to “assign” it to Sage because of the emphasis on what it means to be human. (Translation note: I struggle to translate “cool.” Rendered in plain English, “cool” sounds lame, i.e., the opposite of cool, but in the context of the song, kakkoii actually sounds cool.)
「愛し続けるしかないじゃないか (I have to keep loving)
馬鹿だねって言われたって (Even if I am called a fool)
カッコ悪い人にはなりたくないじゃないか (I don’t want to be uncool)
人として 人として (As a person, as a person)
かっこよく生きていたいじゃないか (I want to live cool)」
Seira: ROSE by HANA
Seira is the archetypal Kazari beauty, and as a Rites woman, she puts the most effort into her appearance. At the same time, Seira might be the most cold-bloodedly ruthless and independent of my main characters, so this was the perfect fit.
“Just like a rose
トゲだらけの (Full of thorns)
My heart ain't yours
醜い世界でも (Even if it is an ugly world)
咲いた 花 泥だらけでも (Even if the flower that blooms is muddied)
I can't hide no more with my beautiful thorns”
Avril: RINGO by ITZY
Another song that could theoretically apply to any of my characters/every one of my novels because it is all about female agency and challenging how women are portrayed in traditional stories. I “assigned” it to Avril because she is the princess!
“So bring me りんご りんご りんご (Apple, apple, apple)
毒林檎だって (Even if it is a poisoned apple) swallow
怖いものはない (There is nothing scary)
Baby 書き換えろ (Rewrite it) my own world (ah)
可愛い顔した (A cute face) hero
お姫様じゃないの (Princess, I am not)
強気で戦う (I will fight with a strong spirit)
運命なんて変えてゆくわ (I will change my destiny)
So bring me りんご りん りんご (Apple, apple, apple)”
Rissa: ユリイカ (Eureka) by Rokudenashi
Given how much Rissa hates making mistakes, hates owing people, hates needing people, this was the choice for her. Also the tension between the title of the book (what could it possibly mean?) and the line “you must live” is just perfect.
「何度 傷つけ 間違って 失敗して (How many times did I mess up)
優しさ蔑ろにしただろう (Ignore kindnesses)
傷ついて 許して 許されて (Forgive and be forgiven)
お前は生きろと言われただろう (And be told to live)」
Rhenise: Answer by Lilas
As a Rites woman, Rhenise is spending a lot of time in front of the mirror examining herself. She also is is the one who hates sitting with any kind of discomfort with herself. If she feels guilty about something, then she wants to do whatever she can to resolve it as quickly as she can, even if it might lead to more problems than just sitting with her discomfort. This song is for Rhenise, and her journey to learn to sit in that discomfort.
「鏡にうつる自分を見つめて (Staring at myself in the mirror)
答えは見つからない まだ少し欠けてる心 (Still searching for answers, still cracks in my heart)
抱き締めていたい今は (I want to hold on to that now)」
Therise: 雪の音 (Yuki no Ne) by GReeeeN / 粉雪 (Konayuki) by Remioromen
I had some inkling of each of my books being associated with a season. When I wrote Rissa Must Die, I wanted the sense of fall to permeate the entire book (a Japanese fall, specifically). When I wrote Forbidden Ember, it was supposed to be my winter book. Interestingly enough, as I wrote it, it became a winter/summer book given the dual timeline structure: Therise with her winter-to-summer timeline, and Anisha with her summer-to-winter timeline. Can’t say too much more without giving things away… but it gets me in my heart every time I think of Therise and listen to these songs (このまま時が止まれば離れずに逸らさずに見つめられるのに, “If only time would stop, I could stare at you without leaving, without looking away” and 同じ時間を生きてなどいけない “We can’t live in the same time”). To add to the emotional depth, Konayuki is the insert song for the tear-jerker of a J-Drama, 1 Litre of Tears.
Anisha: 風に薫る夏の記憶 (Kaze ni Kaoru Natsu no Kioku) by AAA / 打上花火 (Uchiage Hanabi) by DAOKO & Kenshi Yonezu
I struggle with writing setting descriptions for scenes (as I will discuss in a future post), so to get into the mood of one of the key scenes in Anisha’s story, I played these two songs on repeat. Not only did it help me get into the vibe of a Japanese summer festival, but I liked how they both played on the idea of memory (風に薫る夏の記憶 想い出は遠き, “The summer memory I smell on the wind is distant” and あの日見渡した渚を 今も思い出すんだ “I still remember the beach from that day”), since you – as the reader – know you are witnessing a scene in the past timeline that can only be “remembered” by those in the present timeline.
